Morpheous,

First I would have to say that I definately agree with the fact that the single parent home epidemic is sweeping the globe at an exponentially destructive rate, BUT I would have to say that we need to explore that on an even deeper level.

First, we must all understand an accept the fact that this is an issue that is not going to be readily rectified with the snap of a finger or some other foolish notion.  What we have to do at that point in the look at the chain of things that play very serious parts in this problem.  In my opinion, it is NOT the fact that one is born into a single parent home which is the major factor in that assumption.  The primary problem is that the parents are NOT taking the vested roles in the lives of their children that they should.  Together or not, the responsibilities of the parents do not dissipate simply because one does not live at the same residence of their children.  Being that I am a single mother, I know that differences can be made in the lives of our children to push them in the direction of the positive.  Each of my children are on the honor roll, have never been in any legal trouble and are all headed on a path to college.  Are they perfect?  NOT at all!  But I do recognize that the bulk of the burden of responsibility falls on me not my children.

Now, in that, the problem as I said is the lack of parental involvement....and I have seen LOTS of families where physical presence is there...but concern and involvement with the children are not.  So THEREIN lies the true problem.  We as parents are not involved in our children's lives as we should be.  We are not monitoring school grades, participating in the PTA, teaching our children the things that they need to know that are not being taught at school.  We don't have the relationships with our children that allow them to be able to come to us when they are in trouble or need someone to talk to...so they stay wrapped up in television and music and so on...meanwhile those gaps grow into canyons in our and our children's lives.  Since they can not get the guidance that they need from the ones that they should be getting it from, they listen to the little boys who pick up on their insecurities and prey on them by feeding into it.  They trust in the boys on the block b/c they have the new Jordan's and a $600 I-Phone and never go to work or school. 

We don't live lives before our children that command respect, which is why they have no respect.  We allow our children to speak to adults any way that they want to and then when they get disciplined, we run up to the school and "go off" on the teacher/principal or whomever when we should have been snatching that child up and dealing with them.  We don't put our children before God, where they belong!  If and I mean IF we go to church, we allow our children to stay at home because they don't want to go!  NO...they are children!  And children need structure and discipline.  The thing is we try to be our children's friend instead of their mother and their father b/c we don't want them to be mad at us.  WHAT!  I don't care if mine get so mad that they think they want to blow up!  When it boils down to it, they only have two choices when they get mad, 1) to get over it and move on at some point or 2) to stay mad forever and die mad about it.  The rules are the rules and they are not subject to negotiation.

As parents, we need to be involved in our children's lives, our priorities need to be STRAIGHT so that theirs can be.  We need to first walk in obedience to God thereby showing our children that even we have to listen to someone.  We have to be the people that we want our children to be, if we don't how do they learn? Does that alleviate our children of some level of responsibility? Of course not!  Nor does it excuse one parent from their job, their duty/obligation to their children...nor am I advocating pushing single parent homes as the answer.  The men in our communities HAVE to stand up and BE men, be counted and accountable.  When the head is absent from the body, there are bound to be some things out of place...but they can be fixed. 

The men, the heads need to recognize that respect is earned, NOT given.  You can not expect the women and children around you to hold you in high regard just b/c you were the other person there when that child was conceived.  If you want to be respected as a father, you must be active in the role of a father.  We women need to stop making ourselves so hard that we push men away and both of us need to build and have the self esteem to be in support of the other and honest enough to be able to say something is wrong and loving enough to help correct it rather than having the "oh, you messed up..you're gone!" mentality, or the "I don't need a man/women."  If that is the case, don't have children, because they DO need that other parent. 

It all boils down to priorities.  What is important to us.  Down to us being cautious enough not to just jump in bed with people we barely know and have children with them.  Down to not jumping in bed night after night with person after person, that we have no idea who the father of our children are or what children you have fathered.  We just MUST do better!  That is just it, we MUST do better.  If we had the self esteem for ourselves that we should have and the education and confidence that we should, MANY of those behaviors would be obsolete as we would care about US, each other AND our children...so things would be done much differently than they are now.  In my opinion, ALL of these things and more are from some perspective or another are all tied equally into being the problem.

Honestly, the problem really isn't the problem...we all know what they are, the problem is what are the solutions.....